I'm here at work waiting to get off cuz I'll have my Saturday and Sunday off.  I need those days off bigtime cuz I got some BIG homework assignments that are due in a week.  Gotta wash my clothes, go grocery shopping, and clean house, too.  I haven’t had any preferable human contact in over a week.  I never thought I’d say it, but I miss my friends.  I really would've liked to go to the movies tonight or at some time on the weekend cuz that's all that I would have time for as far as leisure activities.  I got an email from an agency I do part time a/v work for and they needed people for Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  Fucking 12 bucks an hour for minimal work at the convention center here.  It's actually fun and I really wanna do it cuz you get to meet a lot of different people with like interests and it's a change of scenery.  And I could use the cash to replenish my bank account.  But I had to work here on Friday.  And if I worked the weekend, I wouldn't get any homework done.  Then my boy Andy and the crew wanted to go to SCW up in Debary and then we would've hit the Club at Firestone later that night for a Sharaz concert.  Sunday we would've went to Universal for the TNA ppv.  So many choices and I can't do any of them cuz I have my priorities.  Man, I can't wait till this semester is OVER!

I gotta write a 1000-page essay about how prostitution in the Victorian era relates to the poem "Goblin Market" and I gotta do a presentation on race theory.  Then I gotta watch some movies for these classes: The Importance of Being Earnest, The Color Purple, and A Room with a View.  The Color Purple I've seen and liked (especially the incest scene) so I don't mind that.  The other ones were required reading for a class but I ain't got time for that shit, man.  I'd rather watch the movie and get the gist of it that way.  Plus, I gotta write 2 more essays of my choice as a final.  Next semester, all my classes are 100% online.  I'll save SO much more time that way rather than catching that damn bus all the way out to UCF.

The hype surrounding Trading Spouses was worth it.  I’ll admit, I was pissed when they delayed it to the next week.  That glob of a neo-christian was what’s called a religious radical.  She was way out there, man.  When she freaked out talking about gargoyles and psychics, man…that shit had me on the floor.  I’ve never heard those words mentioned in the same sentence till I saw that show.  What really had me going is that she eventually took the money (which Fox never really focused on) when they said that some of it was for her gastric bypass surgery.  You gotta wonder why the husband would stick around with someone like that?  She’s completely and totally physically unattractive (although she had gargantuan boobies) and she’s a mental maniac.  How could someone keep that?  I know he said she was the only chic to give it up to him.  And you wonder why!  Shit.  I guess he was willing to wait for the day when some medical miracle would come along to help the fat nutty bitch lose the weight unnaturally.  I would’ve laughed my ass off if she still would’ve refused all that money.  The bitch is a hypocrite cuz after all…she eventually took the devil’s money.  And this is the perfect example of why I always say that religion is the destruction of the world.

Did some job-hunting yesterday online.  It's not that nobody's hiring.  It's just that I ain't got no car to get to these fucking places.  So I'm stuck in this fucking place I'm at now.  Not that I don't like it cuz I'm doing this blog there now.  I just want something closer to home to save travel time.  Have I mentioned how much time means to me?

Niggers get fired all the time.  We no call, no show.  Sometimes we don't even call in.  We just show up late.  That's why more of our black asses are unemployed and poorer than anybody else.  EVEN THE FUCKING MEXICANS!  Makes you think Vicente Fox was right, don't it?  When a nigger gets fired, is it anything unusual?  No.  Is it ever really a big deal?  No.  Why?  Cuz it happens all the fucking time.  So when that motherfucker Page Kennedy got his ass fired, was that not the highest profile nigger firing in history or what?  Them whites had to make that a big deal, didn't they?  If it was one of them that got fired, who would give a shit, right?  Just another unemployed nobody ass cracker trying to be an actor in Hollywood.  They come a dime a dozen in those parts.  Just like porn starlets.  Page got fired for improper conduct.  Motherfuckers are saying he exposed himself to someone that worked on the set.  Whether that's true or not, his career is over.  Leave it to a nigger to fuck up an opportunity.  Just like any other employer, ABC already replaced his ass.  Didn't take long, did it?

Got 2 Chik-Fil-A coupons that let me get a free chicken sandwich without having to buy shit.  Got 'em from work.  Problem is I don't live anywhere near the Chik-Fil-A I can use them at, which is on Kirkman Road.  I live by Fashion Square.  I can guarantee they'll get used, though, cuz it's free food.  I'll find a way.

The reason I'm writing my graphic novel is because I have a story to tell.  My life is just that fucking interesting when it wants to be.  Case in point: I see this shit on tv all the time, but it actually happened to me.  What happened?  Here's the situation.  A customer called in to make a reservation.  I needed her email address and asked her to spell it out for me.  And here's the rest:

She said, "...t-u-l-a-n-e and then there's a little line that comes after it.  I don't know what it's called.  You know that little line that comes after a word to separate it from another word?  That one that goes in-between two words?  Do you know what that's called?"

I said, "Do you mean a dash?"

And she said yeah.  You can't script this shit, man.  I couldn't even believe it.  Actually I should have cuz it happened to me before a long time ago.  I was working at Costco up in Winter Park on the front end. 

A lady came up and asked, "Do you have any of those chairs that you push with wheels on them for people to sit in that can't walk?" 

I told her, "You mean a wheelchair?"

It’s like I’m playing the $100,000 Pyramid without the prize here.  Now, I can understand when people know what they wanna say but their mind just comes up blank sometimes.  The word is there, but it's not.  Happens to me, too.  All the time.  I'm human.  But I've never had to describe a common object to someone for them to know what the hell I’m talkin' about.  Not like these people.  A fucking dash?  C'mon, man.  That's just sad.

Has someone ever asked you for something?  Like, to fix something and they keep asking, "Can you fix it?  If you can't fix it, don't worry about it.  I'll ask someone else."  And they just keep harping on with that same naggin’ ass bullshit while you’re trying to help?  That shit is so fucking annoying, man.  I was in class and this girl needed help to set-up her computer for a presentation.  I was more than happy to help, but her constant questioning (if that's the appropriate term) got on my nerves and I told her I didn't know how to fix her problem.  Don't ask somebody for shit if you doubt their abilities or don't think they can help.  That's a waste of everyone's time.  And mine is valuable.

This week's Wife Swap was funny as hell.  Susan Heiss' argument on the lawn with Ash was hilarious.  It reminded me of Gary Busey's argument with Wendy Kaufman on Celebrity Fit Club 2.  She told Busey off, calling him mean, disgusting, and a bully and he tried to tell the cameraman to turn away.  Susan called Ash a disgusting pig that lives in filth and he told her to get off of his property, basically kicking her out.  She stayed, but the two situations were just so similar cuz Wendy and Susan said almost the same thing in the same way in almost the same situation and their voices sound the same, too.  Anybody that saw that ep had to be laughing as hard as I was.  Especially when Susan's husband wore that dress.  I knew that wasn't staying in the trash when they tossed it.

Ash and his family are called freegans.  They live VERY frugally by choice.  They don't waste anything.  One of their survival methods is to go dumpster diving.  This is when you go rummaging around in peoples' or business' trash looking for edible scraps and good shit to use or resell.  Their reasons are that we are a wasteful society and they want to conserve as much as possible.  And they're not wrong in their beliefs.  I used to be a dumpster diver when I was piss poor and practically homeless.  I had to cut back on all kinds of shit.  I used to ride my bike around the back of shopping centers and warehouses looking for anything useful.  I learned how to utilize other people's trash to my advantage.  This method is known to lots of people now, but at the time I didn't know about it.  I'm talking about getting cardboard boxes from these places to put stuff in if you gotta move or something like that instead of paying for them at U-haul and shit.

Although I drink shitloads of water these days for my health, back then ALL I had to drink was water.  And believe me, a guy wants to actually taste something every now and then, ya know?  My greatest accomplishment from all this is that I learned to check empty bottle caps to see if they were contest winners for things like free music downloads and most importantly a free bottle of soda.  To this day, I still occasionally dig around in trash and I pick up empty bottles to check for any winners.  I have no shame in this.  They say another man's trash is another man's treasure and that's a fact.  I've come to learn that idiots pay for a beverage and throw a free one away all time.  I'll take that freebie and maybe one day I'll get lucky and some fucking moron will toss a big buck winner.  After the TNA shows at Universal, I always check the bottle caps.  Some copycat ass kids and even some adults bite my steelo and start doin' the same thing when they see me winning so much.  Ain't no shame in my game and ain't none in other people's either, apparently.  Monkey see, monkey do theory in full effect.  I don't call myself no fuckin' freegan though.  I'm clean.  I'm poor but I have a certain way that I want to live and money will allow me to achieve that lifestyle.  One term for people like me who live frugally (not by choice) and recognize the need to conserve, but want more out of life than what they have is called opportunists.  Seize the moment before the moment is gone.  Yet if we all keep up our current rate of consumption, then all of us will have no choice but to become freegans.  Take a look at your future, people.  Freeganism is a possible outcome.

Just called this hotel in St. Croix to confirm a reservation at a hotel there.  I asked the front desk clerk for the email address of the hotel and she gave me the website address instead.  Dumb bitch.

Class has been interesting lately for some reason.  Somehow the discussion got around to breast implants that can play music.  I kid you not.  One classmate said something funny after that: "What do you do, press a nipple to play a song?"  I looked online and there is some talk going around to put mp3 and data storage capabilities in breast implants.  Where would you plug in your headphone…the nipple again?  Actually, it would be wireless headphones.  But how do you download more songs?  Where's the power come from?  Does it need batteries?  This is one of the wackier ideas I've ever heard of and I was actually surprised when it was mentioned.  Nobody believed the girl that said it.  But we know better than that now, don't we?  This just invites a new type of crime: tit-jacking.  That's right, you heard it here first!

Why do humans have to put our bullshit onto animals?  I'm talking about marriage.  We marry dogs, gorillas, and fucking pandas for crying out loud.  These animals don't give a flying fuck about that shit cuz they'll go and fuck the next female as soon as she's in heat and have a whole harem of bitches at their disposal.  They're the ultimate bigamists.  They totally shit on the sanctimony of the institution (which is fine by me cuz I don't believe in marriage anyway).  And goddamn dogs will fuck anything; including other humans, basketballs, or stuffed animals.  Marry them, why dontcha?

I've been wondering why my body has been improving lately.  I finally figured it out.  It's because I've been drinking "weight loss shakes."  For the idiot crowd out there, these are Slim Fast type beverages.  They aren't really used for weight loss, though.  They're meant to be used as a meal supplement, not as a replacement.  My favorite flavors are strawberry and french vanilla.  For about a month or so now I've been drinking these on the reg and combined with my stress relief, they've helped my skin get smoother and younger looking.  I barely use lotion on my body anymore.  I have no nagging, lingering aches and pains.  My hair (on my head) has a better, cleaner texture.  I don't have to wash it first before I shave it and it comes off a lot easier now.  That might even explain why I've let it grow for so long lately without it driving me crazy.  I've even gotten compliments for that temporary “with hair” look, so I can go with either or now and still be smokin'!  My body looks and feels better and healthier.  I already had gobs of natural energy (ADHD levels) and now I have more.  I sleep better at night.  And I shaved my body last night and it took less time and my skin wasn't irritated, either.  I've deduced that it's all the vitamins and minerals in these shakes that have improved my physical appearance and well-being.  I know that normally I wouldn't intake any of the nutrition in them in some of the foods that I eat.  It's nice to get all that in a tasty can.  You don't have to buy name brand.  I buy store brand and get the same benefits while saving money.  I'm not a fat, disgusting blob of shit or out of shape and look what it's done for me.  For you fat, disgusting blobs and out of shape people, give them a shot and see what it can do.  They have my personal seal of approval.

The Boondocks is gettin' heat cuz they said nigger too much in the first episode.  It ain't called Adult Swim for nothing, asswipes.  If you can't handle it, don't watch the shit.  There are god knows how many other entertainment options out there to choose from. It's a bunch of Islamic Cali niggers that are gonna start a national letter writing campaign asking Cartoon Network and Aaron McGruder to stop using the word in the series.  Gimme a fucking break.  You stupid shits don't even realize that you're giving the series free press which is exactly what the fuck they want, you fucking morons.  I watched the show and I thought it was funny as fucking hell and it's on my regular weekly schedule now.  When are people gonna learn that it's just entertainment?  And nigger is just a fucking word.  That's all it is.  If you continue to let it offend you, then it will continue to be an offensive word.  Some people just don't get it.  Fucking stupid ass fucking black ass fucking niggers.  First we get fired from the set of a successful, high profile tv show and now this shit.  We just can't take a step forward without fucking ourselves up the ass, can we?  Instead of downing the show, they should be supporting it.  Think about what the fuck you're doing, YOU FUCKING DUMB ASS NIGGER ASS NIGGERS!

Since I been working here, I've come to learn the importance of diversity even more so than before.  That's cuz I work with a bunch of stereotypical Southern American young black females.  Loud.  Attitude.  Weave.  Nails.  Twang.  Ebonics.  Pregnant.  Kids.  You name it, man.  It's fucking chickenhead central here, man.  Another reason I want out.  These bitches have ganged up on me more than once.  I've gotten through to my supervisor though (black female...but from the Virgin Islands), and made her see the need for diversity cuz I point it out when these cacklin' ass bitches start proving the stereotype to be fact.  She says that the owner, who is South African and white, thinks that black females do a better job than anyone else for this type of work.  Are you fucking kidding me?  Hey fuckhead, this ain't the motherland, motherfucker!  This is Florida.  Get a clue.  So why'd they hire me, then?  Cuz I'm that damn good at interviewing for one.  But I've explained that if you had diversity you'd be able to see things from different perspectives and these bitches wouldn't be able to gang up on someone that doesn't fit in with them.  And that's me. 

I tried to get them to see why the turnover was a little high lately and they don't think they had something to do with that.  They get away with a lot of shit...being late is one of them (as explained prior), and new hires are influenced by their lack of work ethic.  Me?  I come to do as little work as possible, work my hours, and go home.  I don't go to any job with the expectation of making friends.  All I wanna make is money and way too many people forget that’s the reason why we work.  These bitches don't even look good, so fuckin' 'em is out of the question.  Their attitude even disqualifies them from blow, hand, and rim status.  Some people like to work around like people.  I like to work around different people and have like people as friends.  There's a big difference.  This place is majorly segregated.  Solids in the front doing the grunt and the "clears" in the back doing the paper.  I guess that's the white African business culture.  Strikingly similar to the white American business culture.  I guess we got more than just the slaves from Africa, huh?

I was talking with Angela the last time I saw her and she asked me if I had grit.  I was like, "What the fuck do you mean by that?"  She was like, it's the ability to bounce back from adversity.  I was like, grit ain't the word to describe that.  At the time, I didn't know what the word was.  I do now.  That word is resiliency.  It's not only bouncing back, it's also adapting and learning.  There are classes that teach resiliency but I don't think this is something you can learn.  This is a natural gift.  You can only develop it from life experience, not in a classroom.  I know I have this trait cuz I've been to the bottom of the trash heap (literally!) and I've been at the top of the mountain, too.  I know how life is on both sides of the fence; recently and most of my life on the poor side.

But the true resiliency of a human is measured when you have a goal that you won't allow anything to stop you from attaining.  That's when you use the gift.  I saw a story in the newspaper about this a while back.  Einstein, Oprah, Jay-Z, Shaq, Ellen...all of these people have resiliency.  They continue to move forward no matter how bad things were or have gotten.  The offspring and highest level of resiliency is serendipity: the ability to turn misfortune into good fortune.  To turn a negative situation into something positive.  Not everyone is capable of doing this.  I can say with complete confidence that I am resilient and have reached that level of serendipity.  Reached it a long time ago and I'm still learning.  And life is my teacher.

I whole-heartedly believe that life is all about choices.  You either make the right one or the wrong one keeping in mind the potential consequences of your actions.  Resilient people are risk-takers.  We make bad decisions just like everybody else.  The difference is that we learn from them and apply that newly found knowledge to certain situations that may spring up in the future.  I call it retrofitting.  That's my own term.  Taking learned info from one situation and applying it to another for a positive gain.  That's how you become resilient.  By constantly retrofitting.  That's how you achieve serendipity, too.  By sorting and finding the good in/from the bad/worse that life has to offer. 

I don't wanna sound like I'm tootin' my own horn or anything.  I just know I have this quality and life gave it to me.  I have my long term goal of completing my graphic novel and I won't let anything stop me from achieving that.  My short term goal is to get my Bachelors at UCF.  Once these are complete, I move on to my next goal.  I do know my short term will happen before my long term and I can move on to another goal once that is done.  I look at it realistically.  Start small, think big.  Certain things have to be accomplished first before you can move on to the next step.  You can't skip steps.  All that half-assing only ends up in failure.  These things are highly systematic and play themselves out their own way, but you have to input some kind of control or personal touch to sway the outcome your way.  You can't control, everything but you can control yourself and your own destiny.  Once you realize this fact of life, you open up your mind and learn from things that don't directly affect you.  You look at the world different from others because life made you do so out of necessity.  This massive accumulation of knowledge can be overwhelming.  Like an information overload.  But the truly resilient are able to sort the good shit from the bullshit.  Thus the concept of serendipity.  It's more of a state of mind than a concept.  You have to be able to act fast and make the right decision like it's second nature given certain circumstances.  Plain and simple; If you want something bad enough in this world, nothing is gonna stop you from getting it.  I sound like a motherfucking preacher rambling on with all this shit.  Lemme stop before you get bored.

Just learned a new term from a coworker.  Do you know what a shine is?  My coworker just told me it's a black person; mainly the ones who show off.  I thought she was gonna say it's because of the reflection of light off of our tar complexion.  Learn something new everyday.  I'll use my resiliency to apply this term to...okay, okay, I'm done.